Can you read a map?

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Happy Friday to all in the Skipahsphere (Webster dictionary status pending on Skipahsphere), got my favorite girl in the whole world back home in Indiana with me for the weekend and we plan on making it a good one!  Even Hammy and Rosy decided to hang welcome home banners up today when the blonde bomber came pouncing through the door.  Bonus day this weekend for me as I get her all night Monday since it’s daddy’s year on her birthday.  It’s actually not until Tuesday but the IPTG says I get her the night before.  Whatever, I’ll take the legally obtained time and run with it.

In other news today HBO is going to start airing Sesame Street.  What the hell?  Is it going to be the lead in to Game of Thrones?  I never saw this one coming, didn’t they try this once before with Fraggle Rock umpteen years ago?  Will HBO reveal the widely pre-conceived notion that Burt and Ernie are gay?  Will Oscar the Grouch get to say what he’s really thinking like anybody else that is forced to live in a trash receptacle?  Will the cookie monster finally get treatment for his binge eating and horrible manners?  Hell I’m starting to get giddy just thinking about it, come on HBO change the format only adults are watching HBO (at least in my house they are) anyway.  Make Sesame Street an adult version, back when it was relevant we were all kids anyway.  Entertain us with our childhood heroes having first world problems.  Get Big Bird on an anti-depressant and airing out is woes weekly to his shrink played by Lisa Kudrow.  Hell HBO you ended her career once already you should give her a chance to revive it.  Loyal readers let’s reach out on Twitter and other forms of media and give us adults something fresh for a change on HBO!  Full disclosure, I have never seen Game of Thrones but do plan on a binge Netflix viewing in the future.  I’m 38 years old and for the first time in 30 years I’m actually looking forward to Sesame Street again!  Make Sesame Street the new Melrose Place!

I think anybody that has been reading this blog for a while has figured out I can be quite the dork at times.  Guess what?  So is Miss Madison!  We both have a penchant for maps.  Yeah I know that doesn’t move the needle in your part of the world but, for me AWESOME.  I’m the same guy that as a kid would study the Rand McNally atlas like I was cramming for a Geography quiz.  Hoping one day I would see this state or city.  As I got older I still enjoyed a good atlas as much as the next geek, but my tastes evolved into older maps of cities and regions.  I mean frigging pinch me, this can’t be real!  An attractive girl thinks I’m pretty cool and not only knows how to read a map (huge bonus points) but digs old maps also?  As soon as I learned of this little tidbit today I turned her on to the Restoration Hardware website, better known as the utopia of map geeks.  Anybody that is feeling really damn generous and clicks on that link message me and I’ll be more than happy to provide my address.

So the unofficial Harold Lederman scorecard (boxing fans will get that) reads like this so far with Miss Madison.

In Common:

Distaste for coffee, love of Kentuckian jokes, daughters of the same age, walking ninjas, blindsided divorces, pop culture trivia savants, allergic to everything but air, and more importantly a fondness of old cartography and a love of geography.  This last point is worth about 20 on the Skipah scale!

Not in Common:

She’s not a seafood fan (that is not a problem any good seafood restaurant serves other alternatives), and she sits down to pee while I have the luxury of standing up.  That’s not her fault it’s called biology!

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Presidential PEZ dispensers, deer growing out of her head, and loves vintage maps!  I never became a spiritual man until last year until after June 20th, but after meeting Miss Madison it has me thinking god works in mysterious ways at time!

All I can say she knows how to read a frigging map!  Even understands how the scale works on an atlas.  I was on a road trip years ago with a female friend (and this was before smartphones and GPS) and was wishing I was wearing Depends because I had to use the bathroom so bad!   I asked my female friend to tell me how far until the next exit, and even pointed to the general area on the map while driving 80 mph.  Her answer it looks like the next exit is about two inches away!  Two inches on that particular map turned out to be roughly ten miles.  If I ever go on a road trip with Miss Madison she will be able to give me the mileage.  This is a huge win for me potentially because I suck down beverages on long road trips and need to know the quickest available exit to avoid a potential public indecency charge.

About it for tonight, I personally want to thank the blogger http://dreambigdreamoften.co/ for reblogging me today on his site.  Also want to remind anyone that cares that the Colon Mission is one week from tomorrow and local readers I would love to have you join my team for a leisurely stroll at Iroquois Park in Louisville next Saturday morning.  Tomorrow is our big Holiday World adventure, I’m praying Sloane’s  first trip on a roller coaster is successful or otherwise I’m going to be spending way too much time at the water park!  Stay tuned for plenty of pictures this weekend on Facebook or Instagram.

If you are too lazy to click on the icon on this page (trust me I know the feeling) you can click https://www.facebook.com/skipahsrealm for Facebook and https://instagram.com/mathewsgary/ for Instagram.

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7 Comments

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  4. I looooove the Sesame Street bit! LOVE! So funny!

  5. HBO? Sesame Street? Maybe I’ll start watching again.

    I’d say your scorecard has all signs pointing to “Keeper”! You guys look very happy together, and that’s what it’s all about! Keep on enjoying life man, great seeing you a fellow good dad loving life!

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