Diet Coke has been taken over by hippies! #FlowerPower
Mr. Skipah is staging his own boycott of the Academy Awards sponsored by Saltines tonight, some jokes just write themselves. The race thing I could care less about since all these people tip Chuck in the valet pool more than I make in a month. Nope more important things for me to do with my time like watching the Zapruder film and picking fights on social media, SINCE MY INDIANA HOOSIERS JUST CLINCHED AT LEAST A TIE FOR THE BIG TEN TODAY! Even better they did it without dribbling a basketball. Thank you to my neighboring community from Ohio State University for getting a little home cooking and luck. That concludes today’s sports report of Skipah’s Realm. Oh and apparently that Stephen Curry dude out in Golden State is really good.
Back here in the real world other things have been happening for yours truly and the future of this website. That big news I eluded about the other day, well here it is. Contracts have been signed, the corporate jet has been dispatched, and Mr. Skipah is now officially Mr. Wall Street. I might have made some of that up, but recently I was approached by a financial institution to write/blog about being a divorced dad and all that comes with it financially. Once I explained to them that I wasn’t about to include pie charts and 401k tips because I’m 120 credit hours short of my Economics degree, they didn’t care about that. Evidently someone in their office found my little sector of the internet and found it entertaining enough to approach me about doing a few articles a month for them on being broke and divorced.
So look forward to some divorced dad financial tips posts in the near future. I’m excited and scared at the same time. It’s unpaid that’s why I’m not mentioning the company, but after they sent me the traffic numbers it was a no brainer for me. Assuming I’m any good at this watch out America! Seriously could life be any better for me right now, kick ass girlfriend in Miss Madison, Sloane was just named citizen of the freaking month at her school, and now a rather large financial business thinks I’ve got a writing style they would like to promote. Seriously pinch me right now.
Get the camera away from me dad! I’m playing Roboblox!
Nothing comes before Sloane though and it was my weekend with her! Long time readers you already know we went all Prince and partied like its 1999! Her ego didn’t swell too much after receiving her award Friday at school, but Saturday morning when her old Girl Scout troop threw the bat signal up in the air to have the reigning cookie champ help them improve sales at their booth that day we were in the car and headed to New Albany quicker than I typed that sentence. O.K. I might be getting ahead of myself, but Sloane and I did get to work the cookie booth with her other Girl Scouts pals. Two hours in a brisk wind was well worth it just so she got to feel normal one more time with her peeps. Reason number 285,242,174 she wants to live with me, she still gets to see her friends most of the time. A theme that unfortunately I heard of way too much about this weekend.
Donald Trump this is what “The Art of the Deal” looks like!
After shaking down local patrons of Floyd County, Indiana for some cookie love it was off to enjoy a Mexican style lunch. She wanted unlimited chips, and I was craving some salsa so it was a no brainer to hit up a Mexican restaurant for lunch. She and I had a blast talking about her current living situation, third grade crushes, and what would happen if yellow dinosaurs roamed the earth.
The follow up picture was going to be titled “White Plate” but I forgot to take it.
Obligatory lunch selfie!
Our evening was jam packed with knife juggling and throwing Molotov cocktails at Kentuckians (damn, wrong blog), I meant to say we sat around the fire singing Kumbaya and roasting marshmallows. The turtle man, Miss Madison Jr, and Sloane tried to unionize against yours truly on how to roast the perfect marshmallow but in the end my expertise of all things related to fire won out. All in all it was a great day.
Not quite as epic as Campfire Penguin, but a pleasant evening nonetheless!
Sunday we participated in the newly formed event “Tour De Madison” and pedaled our way all over the local neighborhood. I can’t state it enough, riding bikes with Sloane puts me in a Zen mode I can’t even describe. It’s like a therapy session for me talking to my little mini adult. She gets things off her chest and I stagger for “appropriate” answers, but in the end I know I’m raising her right in what limited capacity I get to see her. Two out of the past three times I’ve had her the weather has been un-seasonably warm (the other it snowed go figure) and other than my calves screaming bloody murder it has been an absolute joy to have our little roadside chats.
We had to pause for a bit so she could write down all the animals we saw.
She and Miss Madison Jr. even organized a co-birthday party for the dogs this weekend.
About it for tonight, no major news in the Madison Auto Wars, namely due to it’s illegal to sell cars in Indiana on a Sunday. Chalk that up to another archaic law in a state that has way too many of them. If you are looking to buy a beer or a car in Indiana on a Sunday you are out of luck. Now to go research this 1980s D.C. level crack addiction that is Roboblox.com that has overcome my daughter!