Help Wanted

firepit

Only wood being burned in this fire!

Bring back Hammy!  Evidently Muffin didn’t care for her poo-poo girly penthouse of an abode and now has tried her hand at gardening!  Shredded, colored paper evidently works better than most soil I’ve ever tried to grow grass in.  Coming soon, gardening tips with Muffin.  She’s growing grass (chill out Colorado resident) that most greens keepers would be jealous of.  First order of business this weekend is to do a bed check to see what she is really hiding in there!  Maybe she is trying to hide a grape patch in there for her favorite Russian wine.  Damndest thing I’ve ever seen!

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Anybody got a super mini Toro for sale?

June 2016 has been one busy ass month.  As I mentioned in my last post, softball has been keeping me up to date on the latest in Kentucky highway safety, and I can successfully tell you how fast a John Deere tractor goes on a highway.  (Not very!)  Seriously, when did a tractor become a legal motorized vehicle in Kentucky?  Like driving isn’t hard enough, now I have to sit in a line of traffic 20 deep going 15 mph on a U.S. highway rated for 55 mph for five or six miles?  Love my fresh produce as much as the next person, but at five p.m. when I’m trying to get to a softball game, it gets more than a tad frustrating!

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In this picture Mr. Kubota (I think) has used up my daily allowance of road patience points!

Ok, rant over, back to my point.  In ten short days, I’m living it up cheese head style again when Skipah’s Travelling road show heads back to the land of all things milk and curds.  That’s right, we’re taking the kiddos back to Door County, Wisconsin for a week of R & R.  What is so great about Door County you may ask?  I only wrote about it here and even created an online magazine about our travels there last year…see what I did there…. blogger magic!  Of course, I fully expect one or two clicks on that, not millions!  All kidding aside, the kiddos are more hopped up about it than if they were mainlining Pixy Stix, and the adults in this conversation are debating tying the kids up to a tree with bread and water close by (we are humane) and leaving without them.  Just kidding of course!

Since they haven’t discovered reliable internet in those parts yet, and I’ll be short on time anyway, I’m looking for guest bloggers for that week.  I know it is short notice but if anyone is interested in telling the Skipahsphere how yoga can be humorous, something snarky, the joys of going through a divorce, rocking it as a single mom, the inner workings of a ping pong ball, the latest in fashion, or you are just some whack a doodle New Englander drop me a line.  Since I’ve never had a guest blogger, I’ll keep the rules really simple.

There are no rules!  I love seeing the F word used as a noun, verb, or adjective.  Profanity bothers me none, that being said I’m not looking for anything that would get the F.C.C. on my ass.

If it’s controversial and would start a full scale bitch fest on here, keep it for your own site.  I’ve got enough problems of my own that I don’t need the NRA or the Rainbow Coalition picketing out my front door.

Anything else goes, within reason, if interested let me know.  If I get enough response, I’ll make it a new feature on here.  Traffic has been really good the last two months, so maybe you will get more than just my mom as a new set of eyeballs for your own little digital love child.

My first full week of summer is quickly closing out, but it appears Sloane has had the time of her life so far.  In the course of a week (while I was at work), Miss Madison and the gang have taken Sloane to the following:  Girls Inc. swim party, Splash Park, a petting zoo, and a picnic and water play date at Spring Mill State Park .  You will have to wait for the next installment of First Mate Kate’s Take (see what I did there…. again) for pictures.  All in all, this summer is shaping up to be more epic than Clinton vs. Trump!

Plenty more in store for the weekend before I relinquish the little rock star, as Sunday we will be living high on the hog at Churchill Downs.  Hopefully my little good luck charm pays off again for me with ponies.  Best case scenario, I’m filling out tax withholding forms and shopping for a vintage Corvette Stingray by the end of the day.  Worse case, I’m hitchhiking in my boxers to the nearest homeless shelter.  More than likely, I don’t really care, it’s just another dad moment for Sloane and I!

About it for tonight, I think I’m going to set up an indoor camera with Muffin to see how in the hell she is growing such fine grass.  Miss Madison is nagging me again to watch Jeopardy, and was that firecrackers I just heard going off in the distance?  Stop the presses!  Nobody celebrates the 4th of July like Sloane and I!  Damn, it’s already been a year since we had our nightly firework launch parties!

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27 Comments

  1. Pingback: A Day at the Races

  2. Be careful when you ride that tractor in your boxers! LOL!

  3. I can’t wait to read about all the cool things in Wisconsin!

  4. I think guest posting would be awesome. I’d like you to do the same. Don’t think I could this time, but maybe for your next round. Have fun with muffin!

  5. Hey my friend! I’d love to guest blog for you and hope you have a great time on vacation! If you need help with anything I can do via the Interwebs I’d be more than happy to help you!! Xo

  6. It bugs me when tractors ride in the middle of the lane as if they were a car. And it’s usually done maliciously. Twenty, thirty years ago, those tractors rode on the side of rode so you at least had an opportunity to get around them on a straight away.

  7. Grass?! Seriously bizarre! Lol!

    Wisconsin! How fun! Kids must be thrilled at the prospect of vacation again! Yay! And how great you get more time with Sloane this summer!!

  8. Per the usual l so enjoy your big “adventures”!

  9. I had to do a double take with your third picture, Gary. (The one with the tractor) Just for a second there, I mistook it for the Indy 500. I hope you have a great time in Wisconsin, by the way. (I wish I’d more time to try out for that guest blogger spot, but I’m completely snowed under with work at the moment.) Anyway, I hope the ponies come through for you and you don’t have to try your hitchhiking alternative.

  10. I’m enjoying your summer fun.

  11. How in the heck is she growing grass in there? I’ve never seen that before.

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