July 21st, 2014

Well bit of set back in the war, I lost a battle today but I didn’t stand much of a chance in this one. No big deal but still sucks, we have much bigger battles coming up in the future and need to be ready and armed for those.  Rather civil day between the ex and I for once nobody pissed each other off publicly, privately I will tell you she has turned into a half crazy, selfish, bitch, but that’s what this blog is for.   What kind of person intentionally puts one person through so much hell, I never thought of her as sadistic but with her actions and words anymore I don’t know what to think.   I am a big believer of karma and I’m still waiting for the karma police to show up at her door and collect back pay from her.  Frigging ridiculous, hell divorce is ridiculous if you aren’t the one wanting it.  It’s a rigged system for men unless your married to some junkie, kid is under 12 forget it your pissing upwind the whole time.  Wife got her something on the side your a good guy, tough shit, no fault state.  Well after you recover from all that and actually get a little pissed off, start a blog don’t go off on her, then you get calls from your attorney telling you that you are harassing.  Which is bullshit we had worse arguments deciding were to eat dinner, so I’m done with her moving onto bigger and better things namely NOT HER.  Just got to play nice for now, bide my time, enjoy what time I get with my daughter, and hopefully when this is over the karma police will finally show up and she gets her comeuppance.

Got a message from an old very good friend this morning, hadn’t talked to her maybe half dozen times since both of us got married, and yes it’s a she and no there is nothing remotely going on.  Our friendship back then was platonic and hopefully we can stay in touch going forward it was good to hear from her kind of brightened my day for awhile until I got the call from my lawyer, but she made a good point to me that I fell guilty of as much as anybody else that has a good platonic friend.  It’s hard to stay platonic friends after marriages and relationships form somebody is usually going to be jealous and it’s harmful to your own relationship.  That wasn’t the case with us per say we both got married and started our own families and just drifted apart, but I never made an effort to keep in touch.  Thinking back about it was probably because I was married and never made the effort, I will try not to make same mistakes going forward with people I grew up with.  I have plenty of female friends now, as far as I know the soon to be ex was never jealous off, I can’t say the same thing about some of her male friends that we used to argue about, but I also didn’t/don’t have a “history” with any of my close female friends she couldn’t say the same thing.  I have learned going through this ordeal the more women you get in your circle the quicker you get back on your feet, women listen, and don’t get me wrong it feels great to call her every damn name in the book to your bro friends but most of them just agree with you and offer there two cents.  Women actually listen, something about the motherly instinct in them I guess.  They know when to cut me off and get my head right and back on point.  Don’t really have a point to this whole segment other than to say thank you my dear old friend for checking on me this morning.  It meant a lot 🙂

Pretty uneventful night with my daughter, I made her some chicken strips and she wanted to play in her room.  It’s her room and her toys and she doesn’t see them everyday now so I wasn’t stopping her besides I had to look some stuff on the computer.  We eventually made it outside so she could ride her bike and she rode non stop for a good 30 minutes.  My neighbor and I talked about everything her son went through the same thing many years ago, I had to break it to her that I would be moving soon and that was very upsetting.  She is like a third grandmother to my daughter and her not being next door at new place is much more of a loss for my daughter and I than she will ever know.  She understood, and when I have my daughter I will for sure make it a point to bring her by, she is good people and I think she is going to suffer somewhat that we aren’t going to be here anymore also.  She loves my daughter as much as anybody, and it is just another consequence the selfish bitch (my wife) didn’t think about in all of her lust.

My unofficial/official interior decorator dropped off some stuff at my new place, I think she is as excited to decorate the place as I am to let her.  We’ve got some ground rules in place, but I got overruled yesterday on a couple of things and told to get back to work she is the frigging decorator let her go to work.  It’s amazing, things people have done for me going through this, me three months ago wouldn’t have even let people do the things they have for me, now I’m man enough to say I need it.  It’s a break for me, let’s me concentrate on my daughter and divorce, and custody battle and getting my ducks in a row.  I learned the hard way I’m not near as tough as I thought I was and any help people offer take it don’t try to do things alone that you aren’t capable of or is just going to set you back long term.  I’m hoping to start moving this weekend my landlord texted me today and thinks everything should be ready.   I’m excited and so is my daughter, like I said last night just ready for a new normal.  Get back into some sort of routine.  After 13 years of marriage I’m used to routine,  I’m not some 20 something year old banger who flies by the seat of his pants.  I’ve got a daughter to care for, a divorce to get through, work, and relocating I’m ready for normal.  The quicker I get there the better it is for me.  Guess I have said enough tonight, gonna finish up this Reds game and get to bed.

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