Music City Mayhem: Pickin’ and a Grinnin’

 

FYI-Brentwood, TN has to have the highest property taxes in the country!  

Day three in Nashville, Tennessee and I’m belting “Good Ole Rocky Top” at the top of my lungs that morning much like a rooster waking up the farm.  Unfortunately for University of Tennessee fans that song wasn’t played nearly enough the day before as the Crimson Tide of Alabama spanked them like a misbehaving child at any area Walmart.  Miss Madison told me to “Shut Up,” so instead I headed off into the Tennessee wilderness in search of bears, deer, and of course Diet Dr. Pepper

Sunkist is for sissies!

Thankfully I found a Diet Dr. Pepper outlet but came up empty in the search of wildlife.  I did stumble upon the Nashville Superspeedway though.  While not exactly in Nashville, it’s always cool (in my eyes) to see a mile and half speedway dead empty.  I tried to get a little bit closer but Cletus the security guard told me the place was rented out for the day and I couldn’t get any closer.  Granted it was nine a.m. Sunday morning in the south, so I’m sure 75% of the population was at church, but the Jones party had the place rented out, so who was I to argue.  The traffic jam alone was staggering.  I got in and out of there in less than five minutes.  After a little research, I learned this place pretty much is dormant now.

I didn’t meet any Dale Earnhardt Jr. fans while I was there.  Other than Cletus, I didn’t meet anyone!

I did stumble upon this though.  

Once I returned to our K.O.A. mansion, Miss Madison and I were off to celebrate one last day of our mini Budgecation.  Carnton Plantation was up first on our agenda as we took an excursion to Franklin, Tennessee to take in all things Civil War era, American style.  Imagine waking up one day at your zillion acre plantation, and the next thing you know you’ve got Confederate and Union soldiers staging their own game of Risk in your front yard.

Long story short, that is what happened to the Carnton family way back when.  After the dust was settled, they did the “civil” thing and saw to the wounded and the dead.  Fast forward 160 years and you now have the largest privately owned military cemetery in the U.S.  Also if you were feeling exploratory and clicked on the Carnton Plantation link go by the website on Sunday hours.  The welcome to Carnton Plantation sign (I forgot to take a picture) claims it opens at noon, but as we were informed it has been incorrect since they erected the thing.  They did have a gift shop though!

Cost us nothing, and the Skipah chill factor was off the charts after seeing the cemetery!

Next up Miss Madison and I were ready to go Greek and see the Parthenon.  Hell no, we didn’t catch a flight out of the Nashville International Airport to Greece.  Besides, I don’t have a passport, but if ever in Nashville, you must take a journey to Centennial Park and see the exact replica of the Greek architectural treasure.  To quote Donald Trump, “It’s Yuge and Biggly.”  Another picnic lunch was in order and the only things missing in our Greek adventure were gyros and the local chapter of Delta Delta Delta from nearby Vanderbilt University.  The Tennessee Parthenon doubles as an art gallery inside, but that would have blown our budget to hell so we just took pictures instead.  By now Miss Madison was putting bruises on my head as I was admiring the athleticism of the local university girls that seemed to be running at me in all directions.  Hey, all I can say is I appreciate people that take care of themselves!  I’ll be typing the rest of this post with one eye shut as Miss Madison just hit me with a croquet mallet in my left eye!

Women in Tennessee, thank these bronze ladies for putting up the fight so you can vote!

Carrots are proficient in Vitamin A, potato chips are proficient in making your ass bigger!

I’m only kidding about the college girls, but we did take a quick trip to Vanderbilt University.  I know it’s a school that people way smarter than I would ever get to attend, but the campus…..SUCKED.  I’ve seen better architecture from a toddler and Lincoln Logs.  Any Commodore alumni reading this, don’t wear out Heidi the receptionist complaining I don’t know what I’m talking about it, we honestly only cruised a couple of blocks.  So it may be the most beautiful thing since the sunrise in Bermuda on other parts of campus.

These hallowed grounds did send the Georgia Bulldogs packing the day before!

Sunday, October 16^th, 2016 had to be one for the record books for Nashville though.  When you have Adele playing a sold out show at the Bridgestone Arena, coupled with the Country Music Hall of Fame Inductions, sprinkled with liquored up Cleveland Browns fans who hung around after a Tennessee Titans victory, downtown Nashville was rocking, to say the least.

Hello Nashville!

Needless to say, Nashville was booming last Sunday!

Miss Madison and I arrived downtown thinking the rumor had spread that the mighty Skipah was in town and the massive throngs of people on every block were just trying to get a peek of their favorite Hoosier blogger and his trusty sidekick.  My ex-wife likes to call me delusional, and she just might be right (nah) this time.  Of course, there weren’t thousands waiting to see me.  They were too busy patronizing the many honky tonks, saloons, and boot shops that line every corner.  Shop owners were bringing in more money than a Ponzi Scheme.

Miss Madison and I even stopped in a few.  The Bootleggers Inn has more moonshine than your Uncle Milton’s illegal distillery in backwoods Kentucky.  Miss Madison must have been feeling frisky that afternoon also, as we stopped in Coyote Ugly Saloon to see what the fuss was all about.  This particular day Piper Perabo wasn’t around so I put up my autograph book and just took inventory.  The “original” Coyote Ugly Saloon and accompany movie years ago were based on the club in New York.  So naturally they spun these all over the country so drunk girls can dance on the bar.  If I was 25 and single, I probably would still be sleeping in Nashville panhandling for taxi fare for a ride home.  Now that I’m 40 the novelty grew old on me pretty quickly, but I will say I’m sure on a Friday or Saturday night that place gets rather raucous after the sun goes down.

What happens in Nashville stays in Nashville!

We instead headed next door to Doc Holliday’s for some live dart action and to look for any Wyatt Earp keepsakes.  I dusted off my right arm from my semi-retired life as a dart hustler.  Back when I threw darts I was usually the one getting hustled, but let’s not split hairs.  Miss Madison and I split the pair of games we threw before we were lured by the finest in live music from across the street at Big Shotz.

My aim was so bad I thought why not try my luck with sunglasses on!

Titan fans and Browns fans alike were rocking and a rolling to the sultry sounds of the Guitar Hero local yokel that was playing to the crowd like a young Garth Brooks.  It was by far our favorite place to visit while we were downtown and if not for little details like “Who is going to drive home” we might have closed the place down.  Instead, we enjoyed what little time we were there and vowed to return to Nashville for a future time and stay at a place that was within walking distance.

About it for now, again if you haven’t been to Nashville get off your ass and go.  Other than a couple of tanks of gas and lodging we had a weekend full of memories and did it for under a hundred bucks.  In the process, I became a hall of fame gift shop window shopper and boned up on my U.S. History.  Now off to see if I can bribe the weak links of the Chicago Cubs to “fix” the World Series.  I know it’s been over a hundred years Cub fans, but hey the Cleveland Indians haven’t won one in 68 years either!