Things are rolling right along for the blonde bomber and me. Another round of low grade ammunitions lit off last night and some more tonight assuming the rain dodges are area. I’ve also created a professional bon fire expert, and I’m about to petition the Girl Scouts of America for the “State Farm like a good neighbor” Brownie patch. Since I refuse to pay 15,000 dollars for the six sticks of wood you get at the local gas station, Sloane has taken up to collecting sticks from the neighbors on both sides of me. They are both elderly so they welcome the philanthropic work of my daughter. She thinks they are doing her a favor and even wrote one of them a homemade thank you card last night. Yeah my daughter is pretty damn cool!
What’s not cool, picking your daughter up in the same clothes you dropped her off in this morning, and then immediately having her smack a flea off her leg once in the car. Having her aunt tell her last week that anything I’ve ever wrote in here is a lie. I’ll take the Pepsi taste test challenge on that crap! Her aunt is gullible enough to actually believe I have a highly decorated KGB legend hamster living with me so who knows if she can differentiate fiction from fact. Pipe down Hammy , obviously you are real! I’ll say it once and I’ll say it 1,000 times I will stand behind anything I’ve ever said in my little pocket of internet space.
My last dealings with Sloane’s aunt were cordial, start planting crap in my daughter’s head like you did last week and you better go get yourself an attorney. Or do I need to bring the phone conversation we had almost a year ago to court with me? Yeah it’s recorded, and amazingly I was right then also! Since we’ve last chatted I’ve become a social media/internet ninja. One small hashtag or two, tag a picture the right way, there are numerous ways to make your life miserable. Don’t indoctrinate my daughter, she’s persevered through all this bullshit heaped upon her. I will have no qualms in letting your husband know you showed up on a dating website (if you did it to poke the bear grow up already), even more importantly look up IRS whistleblower laws. You are fair game and after the shit Sloane told me its hunting season. Yeah I’m expecting a full apology, or you will get the full wrath of blogger nation and more importantly me!
Anyway rescuing my daughter today and seeing she was in the same clothes that I dropped her off in (and no wardrobe change in between) and hearing the absolute bullshit her aunt told her last week I was a tad bit ticked off. Didn’t ruin our evening though, tumultuous weather kept us grounded so no fishing tales tonight of “The one that got away”, but a pleasant evening none the less. I think tomorrow I’m going to let her continue with her guest blogging since she’s now got the ego of a best-selling author after I told her how well she did. Stay tuned unless something earth shattering pops up in my head the podium is hers tomorrow.
About it for tonight, it’s getting dark and the rain is holding off so far, and it’s time for Sloane and me to keep rewriting the rules of fun!