Stop……Hammer Time!

Calm down America, it has been much worse before, ever heard of The Civil War?

We are currently at day 17 since the last time I’ve seen my daughter, and the stupid calendar tells me it is going to be another six before she gets to return to her native soil.  To remind everybody how asinine this is would just be a repeat in redundancy so I’ll spare you the details.  Never mind, I’m still slightly ticked off that WordPress decided to go all Miley Cyrus on me this week and hit this site “Like A Wrecking Ball” for two days.  So, I’m going to vent for a sec!  If I have said it once, I have said it 2,000,000 times, how or why in the hell can a stranger who only knows me because my name appears on their docket determine that a child can relocate against her wishes!

Why must a dad that has been as active as possible in his child’s life (even with distance as a major factor) go 23 freaking days without seeing his child?  In what world is this remotely acceptable?  Why do I have to put up with shenanigans from a baby mamma that I can only combat in court?  I’m completely done with funding area lawyers’ country club dues for representation that amounts to them telling me to “quit blogging” because you are in contempt for the minutest of details.  When in the hell does common freaking sense factor into parenting?  There is a reason lawyers drive a Lexus as a “second” vehicle and live in houses that cost more than the GDP of Haiti.  Ok, rant over, I’ll never understand family law and if I ever do, someone shoot me, because it’s not fair in the least bit for men that “actively” want to be in their child(s) live unless they are heirs to the Walton fortune.

With no Sloane around I started reading another chapter of the Blogging Abridged Dictionary Volume III.  Per it I’m supposed to mention that we just held Inauguration Day here in the states (in case you haven’t heard and in that case, you probably aren’t reading any online content anyway) and Agent Orange is now my president.  Not my first choice by any means, or second, or third, but at the end of the day, he is the president.  I’m not remotely diving into this lightning rod of potential hate mail and turning this post into material for a Columbia University political science debate.

Instead I will say, what in the hell happened to peaceful protesting?  Good lord, I saw footage of people walking down the streets with hammers.  I’m sure downtown Washington D.C. isn’t exactly the site for you to be building little Timmy his next treehouse, furthermore, a hammer brings peace to nobody but the final resting spot for a nail.  Last I saw, 100 morons had already been arrested and I’m sure there will be much more.  Showing up to a protest like you just channeled your inner kleptomaniac at Home Depot sounds more like soon to be vandalism, and of course you idiots didn’t disappoint.

I think Thomas Jefferson did a complete belly roll in his grave on Inauguration Day.

I’m sure there were plenty of people on various corners yelling “Dump Trump” or whatever else was trendy and minding their own business, bitching about D.C. area Starbucks, and taking selfies for their friends in Rhode Island.  This is known as peaceful protesting, or if you want to get technical since I’m sure none of you know The Constitution, the right to assemble.  My fiancee (do I stick to that or keep her name as Miss Madison on here…, Joey can I get an answer on this) knows The Constitution like Father Flanagan knew the King James Bible.  She assured me that nowhere in this sacred document does it say people have the right to turn Washington D.C. into Grand Theft Auto: The D.C. Mission edition.

We celebrate Halloween on the last day of October, not January 20th.  If you want to dress up like a wannabe member of Seal Team Six, wait until then to do it.  Otherwise, you chicken shits, lose the face paint and all black attire.  It’s one thing to act like a tough guy/girl busting out windows and torching cars.  To do it in anonymity just makes you look like a freaking punk.  To the person that knocked out the windows at the area McDonald’s:  When your Happy Meal goes up a quarter to cover damages and lost wages for employees during the future renovation, I’m sure you will be the first one to hit Facebook and cry about the injustice of paying more for your four-piece nuggets meal.  Just don’t tell me you’re a Millennial, or I will turn into “Get off my lawn” guy!

Usually, after every presidential election, roughly 45%-50% of the population isn’t happy with the outcome.  This has been going on since the beginning of organized elections!  We don’t go around destroying other people’s property because we are mad at an outcome.  The first person that says Donald Trump incites this kind of behavior, I call bullshit.  He has done and said some brutally ridiculous things if this causes you to want to be cast as an extra in the future remake of “Menace II Society,” you need help.  I didn’t get my way when I lost my custody battle in 2015, but did I go stomp on a kitten or practice my spray painting talent on an area overpass?  The answer would be no, I just blogged about it in my own little peaceful sector of the internet that breaks no criminal laws and is voluntarily visited.


Skipah the marketer will now say if you want to become a blogger, buy my “How to Blog” package for $29.95 on Shopify.  It will more than likely land you in court, but after your arrest and recovery from tear gas burns, you will be no stranger to the inside of a courtroom.  If you don’t feel like you are ready to be “A Bigly Blogger,” then I would suggest you try out Jason’s WordPress Tutorial for $28.75 at a local Walmart.

About it for now, my fiancée is now starting class with me on Amendment Two of the Bill of Rights in our impromptu Constitution sessions.  I always thought the right to bear arms meant it was completely ok for me to walk around in public with grizzly bear paws as mittens.  I always wondered why I got such strange looks from people when I explained how I got them.

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  3. I could read this post over and over and over again! In fact I have! 😀 Thank you, it was brave!

  4. I’m a little bemused that a country that allows all its citizens to be armed at all times would care about people with hammers, to be honest! Cultural differences! 😉

    I agree that people should not have had hammers or been violent, but I’m not sure that I agree with highlighting that aspect as though it was a significant undermining factor of these marches. The scale of these marches was immense, and there was really very little disturbance, which is pretty impressive. I think it is a bit unfair to ask what happened to peaceful protests. It was a peaceful protest. A few problems in that many people hardly detracts from that.

    There does also come a point (& I’m not saying it’s been reached yet) where abandoning peaceful protest is valid and necessary. See Nelson Mandela. The difficulty is that peaceful and lawful methods of campaigning and making your views known are great. If you live somewhere with a government that respects at least some level of democracy and upholds lawful methods. I’m not sure you will be finding yourself living in that type of a system anymore – might need to get used to non-peaceful protests!

    (A few years back we had anti-capitalist protests here and the store they damaged was a branch of a department store chain we have called John Lewis, which is a workers’ co-operative. That was pretty stupid. Of all the targets to pick!)

  5. Agent Orange…..I’d laugh if there weren’t so many things to cry about. And still I wait.

  6. I am all for peaceful protests but I am also for unity. We are all going to have to figure this out. Its been stressful to watch! I am so sorry about the custody issues. I wish there were changes there too.

  7. I appreciate what you said about the protesters. Sorry to hear about your continuing drama with your custody and visitation. I’ve mentioned to you before about the same problems with a good friend of ours and his ex (who is a wanna-be lawyer who can’t pass the bar). It’s ridiculous! Being married again may help your case.

  8. I’m so frustrated by the number of fathers I know that are denied time with their children. I would love to see protesting in the streets in support of father’s rights(peaceful protests, of course!). I’ll never understand it.

  9. I think you should switch between Miss Madison and my fiance just to be sure everyone knows she is not just a pretty face or passing fancy in your life. I agree about the protesters. ‘Showing up to a protest like you just channeled your inner kleptomaniac at Home Depot’ cracked me up. And no, I don’t think they were there to build a tree house.

  10. Gary, I was gratified that the women’s marches had hardly any arrests — none in DC or NYC. That’s “yuge” to quote Agent Orange. Sorry about your custody nightmares. Its always darkest before the dawn.

  11. Agent Orange, hilarious! And the “fake” protesters/thugs make me so angry and they take the focus off the legitimate issues and concerns.

  12. I have seen many pictures on Facebook of said protesters. Not one seems to be presentable enough to hold a job.

  13. Hubby commented that this seemed to be the same group of thugs that show up at every protest or demo and bear no resemblance to actual demonstrators onthe topic. Just thugs.

  14. I can’t agree more if you load up at Home Depot prior to attending a “protest” there’s an excellent chance “peaceful” doesn’t fit into your equation. People do need a place to vent if need be…blog on…with Miss Madison continuing to be named as such.

  15. “Usually, after every presidential election, roughly 45%-50% of the population isn’t happy with the outcome. This has been going on since the beginning of organized elections! We don’t go around destroying other people’s property because we are mad at an outcome. The first person that says Donald Trump incites this kind of behavior, I call bullshit. ” — Amen! Well said and sad that it has to be said. Are we really to the point where half the country can’t handle not getting their way? Do they really think that people who (gasp!) didn’t like Obama weren’t disappointed when he got re-elected. [Did you ever see that episode of Seinfeld where they keep saying “Not that there’s anything wrong with that” I feel like I could make a killing on t-shirts or bumper stickers that offer the disclaimer– “Not that I like Trump.”] Enjoy your study of the Constitution. The more I’ve studied it, the more frustrated I get that it’s not being followed!

  16. Personally, I think “the artist formerly known as Miss Madison” has a nice ring to it. Of course, you’d have to persuade her to change her job to match the cool new name.

    As for the art of peaceful protest, I think you’ve got a point, Gary. As you correctly say, you chose a lawful and non-violent way to express your views about everything you had to deal with. You didn’t buy a sledgehammer and go crazy in Toys”R”Us.

  17. Excellent post my friend. People have to unite to make a difference not violate personal property which won’t get them more than an arrest. It is a sorry state of affairs, but hey, there are plenty of opportunities for impeachment. Lol loved Agent Orange!!!! I’m sorry about the lousy court system and your missing you daughter. I hope you get to see her real soon. Keep writing! 🙂

  18. Miss Madison seems to be working, why break her identity?

    The protests about President Trump here in St. Paul, MN turned out very calm and peaceful! There was only one arrest of a jerk who thought spraying other people in the face with a chemical aggravat similar to mace was acceptable. All victims’ faces were treated by local Emt’s and the idiot who did the spraying was arrested and locked up! No damage was done to property here. Down in Minneapolis, that is another story. Breakins to busnisess, damaging cars and other property, basically what happened all over the country!

    Glad I live in St. Paul! Much more civilized up here. Great neighbors. Kids play in their yards and local parks safely.

    Vent about missing your daughter as much as you want! At least you have proof that you care and miss her tremendously. How many weeks till she is old enough to choose who she lives with?

  19. I don’t care what you call her, Skipah, but call her yours 😉 Miss Madison is apt though. It gets old when people say my wife, my wife, my wife — I mean, she needs a name. Since you’ve always called her Miss Madison, I think that’s her name here.
    It’s such a bummer about Sloane, but time moves on. I suggest framing it differently in your brain. Sometimes the only way to do it is to imagine worse. Imagine if Sloane lived in Texas and you only saw her at Christmas, Spring Break, and 3 weeks of summer. Or imagine she’s 32 and she runs a lab on Mars and you won’t see her unless your 80th birthday. You know, stuff like that. It sucks. It totally sucks, but sometimes It Could Be Worse is the only way to frame it.
    Also, don’t we have the thing where she can choose when she’s older?
    While thinking about the orange-faced ******** makes me want to throw things, I have enough sense to know that throwing things will not help. Too bad people don’t have more sense than rage.

  20. Yep, Miss Madison is best. But then wife when the time comes.

    Hope you get Sloane soon, you’re obviously the better and cooler parent.

  21. Miss Madison. . . Not only is that the name your readers know her by, but she will only be your “fiance” until such time as you get married and then what? I say “if it ain’t broke, don’t fix it!”

  22. You stick with “Miss Madison” not “my fiance”. The former is her identity as an individual. The latter is only defined in relationship to you.

  23. I am sorry you are having this problem seeing your child, so many parents are in this distressing situation. It was Thomas Jefferson who said every generation needs a revolution, I don’t think he was talking about Trumps idea of a revolution, to the contrary.

Tell Skipah all about it!

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