Wisconsin Wedding Week: I’m an Idiot

This marriage is off to a flying start!  I thought my initial came first!

I should probably apologize to my fellow comrades in the blogosphere.  Mr. Skipah has been way behind on keeping up appearances, reading, and overall interacting with everybody.  Hell, my little digital love child has been so neglected I’ve got a mad pack of dust bunnies that have taken over my keyboard.  June was a super busy month and I promise to finish up our amazing summer vacation blog posts in the very near future.  July is shaping up with a little more free time after next week so hopefully the six of you that read this dribble of mine will be happy when I get back on a regular schedule!

In case any of you are wondering why the cricket levels around here have been to deafening levels lately, it’s not because the Cornbread Mafia finally collected that huge bounty on my head in the state of Kentucky.  Nor did I get kidnapped by a super secret sect of zombie spies who are mapping out territory for the upcoming zombie apocalypse.  I had a little more going on instead, like learning how to type this post with an added anchor on my left hand.  I haven’t worn this kind of bling in three years.  No, I didn’t get my left hand pierced with dumbbells, I got MARRIED to Miss Madison.

First though, I had to get up to the Badger State, so I could be a part of the waterfront ceremonies.  Granted I was only a stage prop as the groom, but a necessary prop.  Since Miss Madison was already in Minnesota to celebrate her grandmother’s 100th birthday, Sloane and I had to rely on United Airlines to make sure we could get to Wisconsin in one piece.  The plan was for us to arrive in Madison, Wisconsin and get a taxi ride from some friends of ours to their house until my bride-to-be could make the trip east to pick us up.  Sounds great on paper, but remember I am an idiot!  Needless to say before the day was over, Miss Madison had to pick us up!

First mistake of the day, booking a flight at the Indianapolis airport that was two hours away at the wee hours of the morning.  Once we woke up, we realized that unless Scott Dixon was going to be our chauffeur, there was no way we make it to the airport on time.  No big deal, a phone call later we were ready to take a flight at a more manageable time out of Indy.  Except for this guy is an idiot and an inexperienced flyer.  Sloane and I made the terminal in plenty of time, but I had no idea I needed to check into a rebooked flight that I had already checked into.  With great restraint (or my daughter was present), I refrained from informing the airline employee that United sucks and adding some colorful adjectives that would have any English teacher blushing.  Needless to say, we got bumped to a flight two hours later because United thought my seats should go to two other people.  Even though I was at the gate in plenty of time!  Throw in parking at a local hotel to save some coin on long term parking and deciding my car was a good place to store my keys (after I had already locked it), and this trip was just going awesome!  

Idiocy at its finest!  Thankfully nobody stole my ValuMarket savings card while I was away!

We love our Indy cars in the Hoosier State, Sloane and I found all kinds of way to have fun while killing time.

My little bookworm was adamant that I give her time to read!

Sloane and I finally boarded a plane bound for O’Hare and got to spend that puddle jump with a pack of hopeful Marines that had apparently spent their last night of freedom touring Indianapolis area bars.  Even hungover, they were super polite and allowed Sloane and me to sit together.  Once we got to O’Hare, we were facing a two-hour layover so I did what any dad would do, I took Sloane exploring!  We ended up at the Hilton chugging diet coke/root beer and talking to a fine gentleman from Colorado who had just got back stateside from Ireland.  He and Sloane had a blast picking on me, but I wouldn’t have had it any other way!  If I wasn’t still pissed about locking my keys in my car, I would have asked for his business card to promote his beverage company that he was apparently trying to expand to Europe.

Plenty of things to kill the time at O’Hare airport.  I went around making sure everyone knew that the Chicago Cubs suck.  

The flight from O’Hare to Madison, WI was smooth, easy, and my soon-to-be wife was there lickety split to make sure some Wisconsin hooker didn’t whisk me away.  Why she would worry about that I have no idea, because after another week in Wisconsin, I’m pretty sure Miss Madison would be the six-time reigning champ of the Door County, Wisconsin beauty pageant!  

We had the honor of spending the night with our buddies in Milwaukee before we headed north to “do the deed.”  The only thing cold before I was set to get married wasn’t my feet, but the temperature the first couple of nights there in the evenings.  I’ll make sure to tell everyone all about it in the very near future!

About it for now, trust me though, there will be a picture orgy on this site coming soon.  One of the greatest weeks of my life, and I’ve never seen my daughter so happy.  That our friends and family made the drive/flight was both touching and overwhelming.  Our online friends can’t be hugged enough for their generosity.  There is a humongous group though that will be honored in the very near future.  Let’s just say I was privately in tears, but that is a story for another day.  Miss Madison is now Mrs. Mathews and I couldn’t be happier!  (Although she will be Miss Madison forever on this site.)

BJ’s wholesale website - DHGate.com
Send Skipah Sailing!


  1. runawaynunsandleprechauns

    Congratulations! I’ve been a way for a while and obviously missed a lot. Since it’s never too late to catch up off I go to discover what you and that lovely little one of yours have been up to.

  2. Awww <3 Congratulations again!! I flew out of Indy once to O'Hare and yeaaaaaaah next time I'll just walk. Took 5x as long to check in and get settled than it did to actually fly! haha But it wasn't as bad as the one time I had to fly from Chicago to Springfield… 😐

  3. Congratulations to both of you. Get used to the heavy hand Gar! Lol 🙂

  4. Exciting few weeks you’ve had so you’re excused for not being present in the blogsphere – heck, real life takes precedence and I look forward to reading all about your adventures in the weeks to come! Must admit, I did “tut” when I read about you locking your car keys in the car – how did you manage that?! However, I’m so pleased your wedding day went off well, beautiful location, beautiful couple, beautiful weather … a beautiful life together is what I predict for the future. Congratulations! 😊

  5. Wishing all of you happiness and love in this new phase of your life. Congratulations!

  6. Blah, Blah, blah, never mind all the chatter where are the wedding pictures!!! All that aside, I want to wish you both a wonderful, silly, fun marriage full of love and laughter. xx

  7. Huge congrats to you both! Don’t forget to update your About Pages all over the internet…you are no longer a DIVORCED father 🙂

  8. Congrats again. When will you learn your lesson with United, oh well sometimes it takes a brick. Still laughing at the Cornbread Mafia

  9. Congratulations again, and many happy returns! 🙂

  10. So happy your magic day came off without a hitch😉. Hey, as long as everyone was in their place in time for the wedding then it’s perfect.

  11. Congrats again man, I can’t wait to see what all you get yourself into as a married man.

  12. Congratulations ! I am so happy for you and your family!

  13. Massive Congratulations to you both and to the kids as well.

  14. Congratulations!

  15. At least the 2 two little girls are now related (your daughter and Miss Madison Jr.)! The world will never know what danger we are now in with that double team going on.

    Took you long enough to actually tie the knot. Get used to the wearing the ring. If it ever gets lost, you will be in BIG trouble!

    Congradulations on the wise decision. You did not make a mistake! She is a keeper.

  16. I am so thrilled for your happiness and look forward to meeting you one day-in person both of you And the girls

  17. Congratulations, great news !

  18. Congratulations. I adore weddings!

  19. Huge congratulations to you all, Gary! So happy for you! No need to worry about blogging or reading others’, you were a little busy GETTING MARRIED!! Best excuse ever! Glad to see you back and my best wishes to you and your family!

  20. I understand but respectfully disagree about the Cubs. You suck. And really, you spend all this time in Indianapolis and did not find your way to the secret bunker somewhere past the northern fringes to make sure I approved of this lady? I’m sure she’s fine and won’t murder you in your sleep. Pretty sure. Good luck with that, especially if she’s a closet Cubs fan.

    I’m not bitter that I didn’t get an invitation either. I probably couldn’t make it to Indy, much less Wisconsin. Your wedding was probably a cheesy affair anyway, and I dairy-ou to say different. I’m glad you had a goud-a time.

    But seriously, congratulations and we’ll wait and enjoy whenever you have time to scrape the cobwebs and dust bunnies off the keys to keep us informed. I hope you’re all happy with yourselves. And I hope you brought home some decent cheese. Happy honeymoon. I hope you can make it last 70 years or so.

Tell Skipah all about it!

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